Originally, I considered not writing up a review for this PPV. In fact, I almost did not want to see it because none of the matches really appealed to me. A few people mentioned that the show was fine for what it was so I decided to check it out the other night. Because there weren’t many matches, I figured I could do a quick write up as I’m deep into editing my book and really need to spend my time on that effort. However, I wanted a small distraction to break the monotony of editing, which makes this review a good thing to get through.
Jacob Fatu vs LA Knight vs Damian Priest vs Drew McIntyre
This was for the US title. I’m not a fan of multi-person matches unless they’re something like the Royal Rumble. Otherwise, most tend to be “exit stage left” type of unimaginative scenarios where two individuals get the attention as everyone else pretends to sell outside. Being a four way, this type of match isn’t as offensive because at least one person isn’t forced to sell for long periods while any story feuds can occur between two people. I felt bad for poor Drew McIntyre here because he took a scary bump, which pretty much forced LA Knight and Jacob Fatu to finish the match. At the same time, seeing that Damian Priest was partly involved in that bump, it simply made me think even less of Priest.
I suppose the big thing was Solo Sikoa helping Jacob out in bringing Jeff Cobb, who received a nice pop. Jacob would look at Jeff with great suspicion while the referee could do nothing. See, that’s where I hate these kinds of matches because you might as well bring a shotgun and declare oneself a winner. Whenever I see bullshit matches like this where the referee ends up becoming helpless, it just screams of uncreative bullshit with people who do whatever they want. Anyway, unsurprisingly Jacob Fatu won here which felt anti-climatic.
Lyra Valkyria vs Becky Lynch
Here’s another title match I really didn’t want to see except out of morbid curiosity. I still can’t stand Lyra but Becky is awesome. Everything she does makes me believe she’s the best female worker in the business (not wrestler, but worker). The crowd wanted to chant for Becky but she got them to turn on her and get into Lyra. Becky has great facials and can sell the story. She still can do more work on those but I can see whatever time she’s spent on acting lessons has been paying off in these matches. Lyra, Tiffany and Charlotte should all take note. The crowd really got into this match and by the end were chanting Lyra’s name. Becky did a few cheating moves like removing the turnbuckle padding and tried to use it a few times against Lyra but failed.
One of the more awkward moments happened when Becky clearly missed Lyra’s eyes/nose and Lyra ended up rolling Becky up for the pin. Lyra did an awful job of selling her eyes/nose and even the announcers had trouble attempting to discern which part of her body was injured. Naturally, Becky blew up for the loss and continued assaulting Lyra by putting on her armbar for a long period. Lyra merely lied like a lump on the mat while holding her eyes/nose rather than reacting to having her arm being wrenched off. Honestly, this match was almost all Becky Lynch. Everyone saying that Lyra did good should really examine Becky for how she polished a turd here.
Dominik Mysterio vs Penta
One more meaningless title match. I almost didn’t pay attention because I don’t care for Penta to be honest. I’ll watch his brother but not Penta at this point. Chad Gable/Americano helped Dominik retain the title. That was the only important part of this match to me. I’m guessing it’s going to lead to Chad eventually asking Dominik for a favor (title shot) in return and they’ll probably get into a three way with Penta on TV or at a future PPV given HHH’s horribly unimaginative, predictable and stagnant booking practices.
Pat McAfee vs Gunther
Another morbid curiosity match that got PPV time. I honestly don’t know why Pat McAfee was given PPV time at all outside of him being a mark and probably begging management to show off. He looked odd with a mismatched tan and pudgy low abdomen. No one should allow this guy to wrestle because it’s almost like getting one’s dad to show up and have a match. Anyway, Gunther was incredible for carrying this thing. McAfee tried a few fancy moves, missed one and most of this was Gunther just putting the beatdown on McAfee. It was good for what it was being the Gunther show just like Becky vs Lyra being the Becky Lynch marathon. But again this match only served the purpose of demonstrating how great Gunther is. By Wrestlemania 42 next year, the top three people in the WWE really should be Bron Brekker, Gunther and Jacob Fatu. Yes, there are other veterans but I’m talking of the fresh blood who really have broken through, those are the ones that need to be on top because the rest are old, injured or falling apart.
John Cena vs Randy Orton
Speaking of old, injured and falling apart, we had this match. There was absolutely no reason for either guy to go over 10 minutes. Neither Cena nor Orton have enough in their arsenal at this stage of their game to really hit anything beyond a 10 minute match between each other. The match wasn’t terrible for what it was but the ending lasted forever. Too much Paul Heyman/interference type of shenanigans which lost the audience multiple times. Yes, this is the last time we’ll see Cena in St. Louis but at least make that appearance memorable rather than “thank god it’s over” or “finally, GTFO Cena!” I’m not saying either guy are awful but this match just dragged on and they could have easily inserted another match on the card or two for people who needed the air time.
I read that Meltzer said there were a lot of smoke and mirrors despite the crowd being hot. Some people on reddit got mad for his assessment but he wasn’t entirely incorrect here. I wouldn’t call what they did smoke and mirrors. It’s more just neither guy ever had the arsenal to sustain a match longer than 10 minutes in this type of environment. At least, have a match against each other. I’m sure if Cena worked against say Punk, they could do more. Or if Orton had Kevin Owens (despite me not being a KO fan). But against each other, at their age with all their injuries and their respective styles, this would never have been good no matter what.
Final Thoughts
Short and sweet baby. This show felt more like a fancy TV show. I know there’s an upcoming SNME in two weeks but the matches announced for that would have been better services being shown here especially in chopping off a lot of time on that main event. Honestly, the WWE really needs to be pushing that group I called out much further at this point. I don’t know how long many of the current crop of veterans can sustain being on top for their own sake especially when you hear someone like Drew having a scare.